


Please Try Not To Embarrass Me

by DaFox12



Series: The Batfam Is (Probably) Full of Crazy People [1]
Category: Batman (Comics)
Genre: Batfamily, Batfluff, Cutsey Stuff, F/M, Family, Family Fluff, First Dates, Fluff, Gen, I would have put Dick with Wally but I love him with Babs too much, M/M, Shyness, Spying, Tim's kinda shy, Writing Exercise, batfam, gay fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-19
Updated: 2019-11-24
Packaged: 2020-12-23 19:14:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 14,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21086411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaFox12/pseuds/DaFox12
Summary: Tim's date went really well. Like, better than he's ever had. Hopefully, he can keep his family far, far away from him long enough that the guy wants a second one.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I was working on my book and got writer's block, picked up Arkham City again and decided to work a little bit to try and break my block. This was just a fun little exercise to practice stuff like combat writing and dialogue.

Of course it was raining. It was Gotham City, after all. There was a perpetual storm cloud following everyone around always-- even if it wasn’t raining in the whole city, it would be raining on each individual’s head. Not always water, either-- there were plenty of times where it was raining bullets, though that didn’t happen as often to the ordinary citizens so much as one of its many, many vigilantes. On occasion, they even did the raining of bullets themselves! (Though that was often limited to a select few of them. And it was generally discouraged.) And yet, despite the literal rain, and the rain of bullets, Tim Drake found himself smiling. Smiling despite himself. He wasn’t the biggest smiler in the family-- that was undoubtedly Dick, followed most closely by Steph-- and it was unusual for him to be smiling in the middle of a fight, especially these days. But he couldn’t keep it down, even as the edge of his staff collided with the lower skull of the nearest man, bullets flying and his mask splintering under the force and sending the little bits of black that chipped off flaking to the ground, nor could he dampen his excitement as he leapt over the next nearest bad-guy, sending an elbow back to the side of his face and cracking that mask, too. While both groaned and did their best to get back on their feet, Tim threw himself at the third of the quartet, choosing at the absolute last second to slide underneath him and strike with the staff from below, effectively striking the man in the last place any man would like to be struck, especially with a multi-million-dollar stick of metal that comes complete with features like a tazer, retractable shield, and grapnel cables. (His mask had been broken a few minutes ago anyway.) With that one certainly down, Tim rolled back up to his feet, flourishing his staff a few times before lifting it up suddenly without changing the direction of his gaze to catch a wrist that had come awfully close to his face, then grabbed said wrist with his other hand and lifted it up over his foe’s head, behind his back, up higher and higher towards the back of his head so Tim could control his momentum, and gave it a quick snapping for good measure before sending him forward with a swift kick. The other two had finally made it back to their feet, and Tim almost yawned at how long it had taken them. If he wasn’t so damn excited, he might have just rushed them both and taken them down with his staff in one matching hit, ignoring the bullets that were sent flying his way by the one of the pair that had been smart enough to pick his gun back up, but he didn’t have any rush. His plans for the evening had ended about four hours ago, and his patrol had another hour yet, so he could afford to take his time. Plus, being Red Robin was just so much more fun when he let it be, savoring each movement of his body, remembering what it was like when he was Robin and it was more adventure than job, more riveting than boring. But he was about to be shot if he didn’t move in the next three-to-eight nanoseconds, so he flung a birdarang at the one with the gun and swung his staff at the torso of the one without. He crumpled to the ground with a whimper, while the one with the gun dropped it with a shout, stumbling back. He wound up for a punch, but Tim, of course, was ready, catching the fist midair, giving a smirk, rolling the wrist back on itself while the man’s expression melted from confidence, to shock, to pain, to the unabated tears of a child spilling down his cheeks while his wrist crunched under Tim’s fist. To finish him off, Tim offered one single, swift blow with his staff, sending the man’s prone form to ragdoll onto the dock behind him. The search had turned up empty, but the encounter wasn’t without some worth. He had fun, for the first time in a while.  


But maybe being so very excited and happy wasn’t the best option for him. Because he had missed the thug stirring behind him, very, very quietly picking up the gun, and aiming it. Until it was a moment too late for him to react. He lifted up his hands, knowing that if he moved, he would be shot. Luckily, Gotham wasn’t without its share of protectors. The man was swept off his feet in a moment’s notice, a boot drawn across his face, and he uttered a grunt before succumbing to the force of the kick. Tim turned around slowly, one hand gripping a birdarang from his belt, ready to throw, and the other tight around his staff. He saw the reflection in the water first, though, and relaxed his grip on both.  


“Thanks for the help,” he said, spinning on his heels. His grin was faded, but still evident to anyone who had ever studied body language before in their lives. So, all of his brothers, and his sister. And his adoptive father, surrogate grandfather, adoptive step-mother, his brother’s girlfriend and his other brother’s boyfriend, most of his surrogate uncles and aunts, and just about all of his best friends. Some of them to lesser degrees than others. But even without any sort of training, Tim was all but glowing.  


“Anytime, little bird.” She held her gaze tightly on his face, scrutinizing each and every nuance, the corner of her mouth turning up very, very slightly after the briefest moment of observation.  


“Am I that obvious?” He asked, picking up on her observation. He flicked his wrist and let his bo staff collapse, then attached it to his belt in one fluid motion.  


“I’m not the right person to ask, birdie. I’m very good at noticing these things. It is my job, after all. But if I had to guess, I’d say even Superman could tell you were in a good mood.” Every word rolled off her tongue with an effeminate glaze-- just like she wanted it. Though, she wasn’t especially concerned with convincing Tim that she was nothing more than a small, helpless woman. Force of habit.  


“I sure hope he doesn’t, then I’d have a few more questions to answer that I am definitely not ready for,” he muttered, taking a few steps towards her.  


“Hm?”  


“Nothing.”  


“Right. Well, try not to get yourself killed. I’ve got another lead to follow up on. I hear Ivy’s back in town. Call if you need anything, and I’ll see you in the morning,” she purred, then turned away, unhooking her whip from her belt and letting it unfurl. “Oh, and Red Robin? I’m glad to hear your date went well.” She snapped the whip at the crane of the shipping container nearby, then pulled herself towards it, lunging up, up, up, and vanishing into the night. Tim felt himself blush harder the moment she was out of sight. Catwoman was teasing him now. Catwoman, his adopted stepmother, was teasing him about his date. And somehow, that only made him smile wider, alone, to himself, in the middle of a Gotham City shipping yard, at 3 AM, with the broken bodies of Black Mask’s gang groaning around him.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next morning, the coffee pot is broken and Dick is being all smothery...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a dialogue exercise in the same plot, I guess! I'm usually really good with plots but that does not exist here. No, sir, here we just have nonsense that I've thrown on a page. Enjoy!(?)

“Hey, Timmy,” a voice called out to him as he fussed with the coffee pot. He knew he had it set to be ready as he woke up, and yet, the beans were still distinctly unground, sitting in the little part of the machine that was supposed to grind them up. If he wasn’t still riding the high from last night, he might have broken it right then and there. It wasn’t like B couldn’t afford a new one. “Huh? Oh, yeah, it’s just Tim. Do you wanna say hi? Yeah, I know you talk to him every day, but maybe it would be nice to talk, y’know, without a mask between you?” He muffled the last several syllables, making it sound like the last bit of the sentence was meant to be secretive. This string of words prompted Tim to turn around and take a look at what exactly Dick was doing. His assumption of talking on the phone to Barbara was confirmed when he looked back and saw the phone sitting on the table, Babs’ portrait next to the “hang up,” “speaker,” and “dial” buttons. The “speaker” button was active. 

“Hello? Dick? Are you still there?” Dick practically pirouetted around Tim, sending him looking around with sleep-glazed eyes to figure out precisely what that fast blur of movement had entailed. His eyes managed to focus on his older brother in a tank top and sweatpants, reaching up and plucking a box of cereal off the top shelf of the highest cabinet while posed up on his tiptoes.

“Yes, darling angel, just grabbing a box of cereal,” He replied, practically corkscrewing as he gracefully spun off of his toes.

“Don’t call me that again.”

“Yes, love-muffin.”

“Please don’t make me show you why Gotham Gazette ranked Batgirl as the second-scariest member of the Batfamily behind only Batman himself,” Barbara pleaded, her voice sounding particularly exasperated. It wasn’t unlike them to talk for hours at a time, so it was possible she had been falling victim to these laughably bad nicknames for quite a bit of the morning now. 

“Only because Red Hood wasn’t out of his grave yet, baby-doll.”

“Now you’re calling me supervillain names? Ouch.” Tim cracked a smile just as the coffee maker came to live, grinding the beans with a loud whirr. 

“Are you ever gonna say hello to Tim, my little Killer Croc?” 

“Hi, Tim. Wanna help me murder your brother?” Came Babs’ callous reply. Tim snorted then almost swooned as the grinding halted, meaning the sweet, bitter taste of coffee would be his in only moments. 

“Hey, no fair.”

“Nah, no thanks Babs. He’s not the brother I would pick to kill first.”

“Guys, I’m standing right here.” 

“And?” They both chirped in unison, eliciting a laugh from Dick. 

“Nothing,” he replied, humming and going back to his bowl of cereal, already halfway gone. 

“So Tim,” Barbara asks, the phone still sitting on the kitchen island, now a bit away from Dick, though still in earshot, “Selina tells me your date went well?”

“Oh,” Tim exclaimed quietly, almost dropping the creamer completely into his mug and completely overpowering the coffee. “Yeah, it went well.”

“Your what?” Dick shouted, literally, actually shouted, from his perch at the head of the table, far across the room. Tim took a sip of his drink, almost retching at the taste, and Dick was standing next to him in the very next moment. Tim had put in way too much creamer.

“Oops,” muttered Barbara from her throne on the kitchen island. Tim could feel blood immediately rush to his cheeks. 

“Why wasn’t I the first one to hear about this, Timbo?” Dick asked, his blue eyes wide enough to replace the sky. A strand of his hair had fallen in front of his face and he blew it up and away, shook out his head for a moment, then resumed his death-gaze upon his younger brother.

“Um, because I knew you would give me a bunch of arbitrary advice that I didn’t really need?” Barbara snorted from the phone and Dick’s jaw went slack before quickly reasserting itself into that square, chiseled alignment it always took. 

“That is... “

“The truth?” Muttered Barbara from the phone. 

“No, that is... hurtful, and I respect your choice, but I am still sad.”

“Right… Do you want some coffee, Dick?” Tim offered the pot before bringing it back for a moment and pouring more into his mug to do his best to offset the brutal taste of creamer, then taking another sip, satisfied, before offering it to Dick again.

“No, I’m still reeling from your betrayal.”

“Oh, get over yourself, drama king,” Barbara chimed in again. It was funny in an offhand sort of way that she was still relegated to chiming in on their conversations even while on a personal call rather than an Oracle comm. 

“No, I’ve failed my job as a big brother, my little bro thinks I give bad advice. I’ve lost my purpose. The world is going dark.” Tim rolled his eyes and did his best to reach to the top of the fridge and pull down the fruit bowl sitting up there, but he couldn’t make it, so he instead resigned himself to vaulting up onto the countertop and reaching it from there, his socks making the marble very, very slick. 

“Listen, Dick, it wasn’t because I thought you give bad advice, it’s just that it was kinda with my best friend, so I thought I could probably handle it.”

“Oh, what a world, what a world, I’m gonna melt,” Dick belted out, and Tim could feel Babs roll her eyes through the phone. “The least you can do is tell me how it went, buddy.” Tim could feel that smile blossoming on his face again. He picked up his mug and topped it off, not bothering to add any more creamer, because he had enough in there from earlier, and slid into a chair next to Dick. “Hey babe, let me call you back later?” 

“Please. I’m all ears, Tim, as long as that’s okay with you.” Dick stood up and grabbed his phone, plopping back down in his chair. Tim shrugged. As if she could see that.

“Yeah, no problem B.”

“Okay, so first off, who was it with?”

“Um, Conner.” Dick’s eyes fluttered for a moment and he re-positioned his face so he could look more intensely at Tim’s face. 

“Really? Damn. I didn’t peg him as the type. Then again, I didn’t really peg Wally as the type until we-” Barbara cut him off with a sharp clearing of her throat. 

“You really want to sleep on the couch tonight, don’t you, Richard?”

“I thought you were coming over here?”

“Bruce’ll let me force you to sleep on the couch.” Dick gave a pouty lip and sighed. 

“Whatever. Anyhow, Timmy, how did it go?”

“Honestly? I thought it went really well. We went to dinner, and he like, pulled out my seat for me, and I sat down and he pushed it in and everything, and I thought it was really cute. We just sat around and joked for a while, and it was just like a normal hang out with us, but with candles in the middle. In case you were wondering, his eyes look about fifty times even more amazing in candle light.”

“Aww, my little bro is all grown up.” Dick moved to pinch Tim’s cheeks, to which he blushed and turned away. 

“Hey, hey, leave me alone! Get off me, Grayson!” Dick continued a relentless barrage on Tim’s head, ruffling any inch of his hair he could reach and pinching any bit of face he could reach.

“Yikes. Damian much? Calling him Grayson?” Chirped Barbara.

“Please don’t ever compare me to Damian again. Please.”

“Speaking of Damian, isn’t he friends with your boy’s little brother? Maybe we should have the whole Kent family over one night,” Dick said, finally ending his onslaught of brotherly affection. Tim’s eyes went wide and he offered nothing more than a quick, jarring shake of his head.

“No. No way. Nope. See, Dick, I want him to like me. And he will not like me after dinner with you people.”

“Nah, we wouldn’t be too embarrassing.”

“Are you sure about that? Are you really sure?”

“Hey, Tim, I’ll keep this one in check. I can promise you that. Under the table punches to the thigh and what have you. It’s mostly Jason you’ve got to watch out for.”

Dick poked at his cereal, now thoroughly soggy. Tim took another generous swig of coffee, still distraught with the heavy aftertaste of Almond Happiness Creamer. 

“Yeah, Jason. Maybe we just don’t invite Jason? Do you think I could convince Alfie to-”

“No.”

“Nope.”

“Damn. You’re right.”

“I think it’s a good idea, Tim. I’ll bring Babs over, you can bring Conner, Jason can bring Roy, and Damian can hang out with Jon. Or maybe he can bring Colin, too. Wait, hold on... “ Dick rubbed his temples, then blinked twice, heavily. The grandfather clock in the other room clicked again and again. “Maybe we should have the Kents over a different night and have all of our significant others over one night. Then we can have dinner with your boyfriend twice! He gets all the Wayne family love.” Tim really wished Barbara was here to exchange disappointed glances with, but alas, she was here only on speakerphone. 

“Not to be as dramatic as you, Dick, but I’m pretty sure I’d rather die. And he’s not my boyfriend! Not yet.”

“Tim, have I ever told you you were my favorite Robin? You were my favorite. You are my favorite.”

“Hey! We dated for the first time when I was Robin!” Dick threw his hands up in frustration, bringing them crashing back down to the heavy oak. Tim’s mug would have shuddered on the table if it wasn’t safely in his hands. 

“Right. And yet, Tim is still my favorite.” Dick shook his head. 

“Anyway, I’m gonna talk to Alfie about it. I think it would be cool for Batdad and Catmom to meet everyone’s significant others, anyway. Like a little family thing! Dami can bring Colin since he’s too young to be dating, and Cass can bring Steph.” 

“Dick, I really don’t think it’s a good idea. Bruce obviously already knows and has worked with Steph and Babs before, but you know how he feels about Metas in Gotham. And you know how he feels about Roy. I just… I don’t wanna scare Conner off, you know?” Dick’s eyes bore into him for a moment in the way only Dick’s could. He had this bright, callous, and analytical mask denoting the shape of his face, and his eyes were sharper than ever.

“You really like him, huh? Well, I promise I’ll help you then, pal.” Tim’s face slowly ticked into a smile, almost matching the pace of the clock’s incessant hammering. 

There were a few more moments of silence, Tim and Dick sharing a few moments of mutual understanding, before the door to the kitchen flung open.  
Jason and Roy, gripping each others’... well, just about everything, faces mashed together and desperate breaths escaping their mouths between each kiss emerged from it, stumbling in and drawing both Dick and Tim’s attention. The couple approached the table and Jason thought it was quite the opportune moment to hoist Roy’s legs up around him, then shove him onto the table. The wood groaned and Dick’s spoon clanged against his bowl. Tim’s coffee was, once again, safe. Jason didn’t bother to even look up until Roy’s back was against the table, his hair draping almost far enough to reach the lavish decor in the middle. He hitched his leg up and around Jason, demonstrating flexibility that both awed and appalled both Tim and Dick (not that they couldn’t do it themselves, but that it was from Roy), and drew him closer to close the distance between them. If you could call spare air particles distance. Finally, mercifully, Jason looked up, then released his grip on Roy, who had been sucking marks into his neck until it wasn’t there for him to interact with any longer. He sat up and ran a hand through his hair, a sheepish look on his face. Jason showed absolutely no remorse, and neither Tim nor Dick was surprised by that. 

“Uh, hey, Dick,” Roy muttered, sliding off the table and to his feet. Dick gave a little wave, spoon in hand. “Tim.” Jason shook his head.

“Good morning, my fellow birds,” Jason bellowed, taking glorious strides over towards the side of the table both Dick and Tim were sitting at, still both in shock at what they had witnessed moments ago. He grabbed a chair and spun it backwards, then wrapped his legs around the opposite way and sunk down into it. Roy sat at the other end of the table, pretending to be particularly interested with the hem of his shirt. It would have been the brim of his hat if it wasn’t on Jason’s head. “How was the date, Replacement?” He ruffled Tim’s hair, and Tim flinched like he had punched him. 

Dick looked at Jason, then at Tim, cocking his neck.

“Was I the only one who knew nothing about this?” Tim made a face and shrugged.

“Yeah,” said both Jason and Barbara in unison. 

“It um,” Tim cleared his throat. “It went good, Jay.”

“I’m glad to hear it. When do we get to meet ‘em?”

“Never, if I’m lucky,” Tim muttered. Jason looked around as if to ask, “Is this guy serious?”

“You really think Alfie’s gonna just let you go without meeting your new datemate? Hell no.” 

“I’m actually gonna try to get him to set up a dinner for us all with our boyfriends and girlfriends if you think that would be cool, Jay,” Dick added. Barbara was practically laughing in the background. Tim could hear how much fun she was having. Jason exchanged a glance with Roy.

“You think he’ll really want us there?”

“Yeah! Why not? I mean, it’s like a family thing. We all bring our person and get to have a little family dinner.”

“Right…” Tim’s phone vibrated mercifully in his hand. He peered down at it. Conner. 

“I um, I’ve gotta take this, guys,” he said, standing up and backing out of the room.

“Like it or not, Jason, you’re a part of this family!” Shouted Dick.

“Well I, for one, don’t want to submit my boyfriend to constant badgering by my family about how he doesn’t have a real job or that he isn’t a real hero,” Jason retorted, and Tim practically slammed the door shut behind him. He walked a few more rooms away, ending in a sitting room, and slid into comfort on the couch, accepting the phone call.

“Hey, Timmy. What’s up, buddy?” His voice was husky and stiff, like it always was, and yet, this time, Tim’s heart did a little flail.

“Buddy? I thought you were done calling me buddy after you stuck your tongue down my throat.” Conner scoffed.

“Never done calling my best pal ‘buddy.’ Even if he is my, um, person that I go on dates with these days.”

“You have great timing.”

“What is it now?”

“Dick wants to have a dinner with the family, and-”

“That doesn’t sound so bad.”

“-And he wants us to bring our significant others and stuff, and I don’t really-”

“You don’t want me around your family?”

“That is definitely not what I said. I just don’t want my family around you.”

“That’s the same thing, Red.”

“No, I mean… I just… They’re the worst. And I don’t want you to feel weird or anything, you know?”

“Listen, Tim, your family, who I have met most of before, is not going to scare me off from dating you. Er, liking you.”

“Meeting Batman is not the same as meeting Bruce Wayne.”

“So, it should be easier then.” Tim shook his head, as if Conner could see it through the phone.

“No, no, no. Batdad Bruce Wayne is about nine-thousand percent scarier than Batman. Because you’re not an enemy to Batman. But to Batdad? Boyfriends and girlfriends and datemates of all kinds are public enemy number one. Forget the Joker. You’re his worst enemy when he isn’t wearing the mask.”

“That’s… sweet. He wants to make sure you’re happy!”

“That’s not even to mention my brothers. Damian will probably try to kill you, Dick will smother you, and Jason will bring up some creepy story that’ll give you nightmares for weeks. They’re all a whole hell of a lot scarier than-”

“Tim. I’m sure it’ll be okay.” Tim sighed.

“Okay, okay. Um… What are you doing later today?”

“Hopefully you.”

“Oh! Uh, um, er... “ Tim blushed aggressively. 

“I’m kidding. I think we should save that for later. But I am free, and I would love to see you before I meet your family for real. Maybe go on more than just our first date by then.”

“Kon? I really, really like you.”

“Aw, I like you too, Tim.”

“Please kiss me first thing when we meet up later.”

“Absolutely. Can’t greet my prince without a formal kiss, can I?”

“Prince? I like that. I’m more of an heir… and a CEO, but I’ll take what I can get, I guess. Where did you want to meet?”

“Considering only one of us can break the sound barrier, I’d say somewhere in Gotham. Why don’t I stop by the Manor at like sevenish and we can go from there?” Shouting from the kitchen was escalating. Tim could hear glass shattering now. And Alfred’s sigh, despite the man not being anywhere in the room. But Tim was grinning.

“Okay, yeah. That sounds great.”

“Cool. See you then, Timmy.”

“Bye, Kon!”

Tim kind of hated feeling like a little boy, but also really, really loved it.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Date Night for Timbo and Kon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I broke my writer's block! I'm not sure how much more I'm gonna work on this. I feel obligated to get at least to the dinner that was the whole point of this little thing, so I think I'll make it at least to that, but as for any more, I'm not sure. I thought of writing a little road trip story, so maybe I'll write that after this? I'm not sure yet. Time shall tell.

5:59 P.M. It was only 5:59 of the most agonizing day Tim had ever gone through. Well, perhaps not the most strenuous of all time, that would probably have to go to a particularly bad day in which Bruce was off-planet with the Justice League and Tim had to work with Jason, Cass, and Steph to take down a grand total of fifteen villains in one night. That was certainly stressful. But that night was stressful as Red Robin. Tonight was stressful as Tim Drake, and that was almost certainly worse. Bane had nothing on the possibly mortification of embarrassing himself in front of Kon. But the thing was, that little, teeny, tiny thing that made his heart-rate slow for just a moment, was that it was his best friend. It was Kon, and he’d seen just about a million embarrassing things from Tim. The time he accidentally snorted spaghetti? Kon was there. The time that he accidentally called Gar “Jason” while he was scolding him and Gar took about four years to let him live it down? Kon was there, teasing him all the same. The time Jason thought it would be a great idea to switch Tim’s gear with the “Classic Robin Getup” and Tim had to fight in the “classic” scaly underwear? Kon was there, telling him that if there was an upside, it was that his legs were “definitely something worth showing off. (That last one was probably when Tim realized that he had feelings for him. Still, embarrassing nonetheless.) But he would have to wait a whole hour more before he could even have the chance to embarrass himself. And he was spending it the way any well-adjusted eccentric twenty-something who was also the CEO of a major company would do: sitting upside down on a couch at his dad’s house, looking at paperwork. It was only a matter of time before someone came in and bugged him, but at least he could get something done. Which, with how busy he was, was always an upside. Always. Except, the room he was in had a huge grandfather clock (he was almost certain Bruce had a thing for collecting them and had never told anyone), which let him count each and every second down. Which was, of course, not helpful. 

He decided, after several more minutes of waiting and focusing on the clock and not working, that he should maybe probably actually do something. But getting up also did not sound ideal. Nor did the possibility of running into anyone in the house. Except maybe Cass. But if Cass was around, then there was a good chance Steph was around. And he did not want to deal with her at the moment. He also would like to avoid Dick, Jason, Roy (who honestly shouldn’t be in the manor at all, but whatever), Damian, Bruce, Steph (again), Harper (if she was even still around), Duke (although he didn’t really hang too much around the manor these days), and Helena (if she was even allowed in). The only people he honestly wouldn’t mind talking to right now would be Alfred, Babs, Cass, Selina, and, well, Conner. 

Damn. Even thinking of his name made his heart jump just a little bit. 

Crap, now his heart was beating harder. Probably didn’t help that he was sitting upside down, so all the blood could rush to his head, but it made him feel like the biggest loser on earth that he was actually getting excited over thinking about Conner. 

He really needed to get up.

Finally, after much internal debate, and a struggle known only to the bravest of humanity, he rolled forward onto his head and hands and used the momentum from the roll to do a handspring and land softly on the other side of the very glass, very breakable, center table. Alfred wouldn’t kill him tonight, which was good news. 

Moments later, through his bored haze, he found himself in the cave, right in front of a training dummy. Nothing too exciting, but enough movement to be distracting. Distracting enough that he didn’t hear anyone enter the cave, though he did hear them approaching. He assumed it was Jason, or someone who would be able to parry a kick, or Alfred, who certainly knew after all of these years not to sneak up on an adolescent boy attacking a dummy. 

So when he leapt backwards and did a leg sweep to the mystery arrival, he was certainly surprised when said person did not move a single centimeter, and that his leg felt like it hit solid steel. And it did. The Boy of Steel. The Teen of Steel? The Small Man of Steel. The Young Adult of Steel. Whatever. He kicked Conner who had snuck up on him. 

“Ow.”

“Hey, I didn’t mean to sneak up on you! I’m sorry,” Conner said, flashing those eyes of his down at Tim all puppy-dog like. He reached his hand down to help Tim up, which was immediately accepted. 

“How the hell did you get in here?” Tim asked, reaching his feet. Conner looked behind him.

“Oh, um… Stephanie let me in,” he replied, avoiding eye contact with Tim. 

“Right. I’m sorry, I would have met you outside, but-”

“It’s okay! I don’t mind. I just don’t think I’m supposed to be in here. I’m pretty sure if the big guy sees me, I’ll learn all about Kryptonite, and I’m definitely not hoping for that.”

“Yeah, we should probably go,” Tim muttered, looking around. “I’m still sorry I lost track of time. Even if you’re sweet and don’t care.”

“Yeah, I was waiting outside for a while, so I’m pretty glad Steph let me in.” Tim walked towards the armory, placing his gloved hand on the colorless handprint reader. It sprung to life, the outline glowing a piercing blue before receding and being replaced by a hissing as the doors swung open after a moment of whirring. The empty case for the Red Robin suit was immediately accessible.

“I’m sorry. How long were you waiting for?” Tim asked as he pulled his cape off. 

“Oh, not too long. Probably like an hour or something.” Tim was in the process of pulling off his mask, but stopped after only one eye had come free from the mask’s adhesive.

“For how long?”

“An hour. It wasn’t too bad, don’t worry. I don’t think your butler is home, ‘cause no one answered when I knocked on the front door, then I tried to fly around and see if anyone was in the house, but then I decided that was a little creepy and stopped, and then I sat on the front steps and texted Bart until Stephanie showed up on her motorcycle and told me the key was under the mat and let me in,” Conner replied, shrugging.

“There’s no key under the mat.”

“Yeah there is, she pulled it out for me.” Tim resumed removing his mask, then took off his utility belts, then started working on his chestpiece.

“I’ve lived here for like four years now. There’s no key under the mat. Bruce would never allow that. Ever.” Conner shrugged in reply.

“I don’t know, buddy, maybe she made a copy of a key to get in?” Tim’s shirt was sticking to the chestpiece from sweat, and as he put it back onto the case, his shirt went with it just enough to show his abs underneath it. He swore he saw Conner blush. 

“There’s no way.”

“Listen, pal, I saw what I saw. I can show you, if you want,” Conner said, shrugging so his biceps made the sleeves of his shirt strain. Tim started on his greaves, and couldn’t help the very, very coy smile on his face as he pulled them off and bent over to set them back in the case. The leggings he wore underneath were tight. 

Conner’s breath hitched and he looked away. He wasn’t sure he was ready to die today.

“Nah, it’s okay, man,” Tim said from within his tight athletic wear, now standing straight up again. He was just a few inches shorter than Conner, but something about that difference made him want to melt right into the cave floor. Now that his boots were off, too, they could go spend some real time together. “Where do you want to go today?”

“I figured you know Gotham better, so you should pick,” Conner replied, the corner of his mouth curling up. Tim knew that look. It was the same one he’d gotten when Conner asked him about eighteen times why Cassie was so mad at Bart, and knew he was getting under his skin by doing it. And Tim certainly wanted to kiss that off his lips right now, but he should probably give it at least a little bit longer. This was only their second date, after all, and Tim had shown up an hour late to the date that was set to start literally outside his house. And he hadn’t even made it out to where they were supposed to meet yet. No, Tim did not get to think that far ahead. Not yet. 

“Um, there’s always the Stacked Deck,” Tim muttered, leading Conner up to the Cave stairs. The systems went dark as they reached the threshold. 

“Huh?”

“Nothing, bad guy joint. Good place to go if you’re up for a fight, but not a great place for a date.” Tim watched the clock slide shut behind them, and inspected Conner’s face as he admired the quiet room. Most of it was still under sheets and had been for years, but the walls were still decorated by some professional Bruce’s dad was especially fond of, and Tim had to admit that it was at least a somewhat impressive piece of art. Not as impressive as some of the other pieces in the house, nor as impressive in the excited little glow in Conner’s cheeks as he looked from wall to wall, admiring every curve in the color with some sort of ingenuous admiration, but it was nice nonetheless. Also, Tim really, really wanted Conner to look at him like that. 

“So, what is a good place for a date?” Conner asked after another moment of inspecting the wall silently. He followed Tim out of the room towards the main hall, then into the foyer. 

“I know a good sushi place. It has a nice view of the ocean.”

“I don’t really need a pretty view, I already have, ehrm…” Conner’s voice trailed off and Tim felt like he was about thirty seconds away from bursting into flames.

Stephanie giggled from behind the railing of the stairs, though it was quiet enough that Tim didn’t hear and Conner thought it was coming from somewhere else in the house. Jason shot her a look. Cass made no sound. 

“Right, um, we should probably drive there, because flying to a restaurant is no good for secret IDs, you know?” Tim’s voice cracked while he was speaking, and he prayed that Conner didn’t notice.

Conner thought it was really damn cute, especially when Tim’s cheeks bloomed just a little pink after his little voice crack. It was almost illegal to have such a nice jawline, too, wasn’t it? And his hair was looking a little shaggy these days, but it was doing him favors. Honestly, Conner could stay here all night and stare. 

“Yeah. Um, I don’t have a license. I’m only nine.” Conner said, his eyes locking on Tim’s.

“Oh my god, I forgot, you’re literally nine. I was really not ready for you to say that out loud,” Tim laughed. “Does this make me, like, creepy, since I’m an adult?” 

“Uh, I don’t think so. Mentally I’m twenty-five, so I think we’re good. We are good, right? If you-if you don’t wanna go out with me, that’s cool. I don’t wanna make you uncomfortable or anything, and-”

“Hey, Kon, it’s all good, buddy. I don’t think anything could stop me from enjoying spending time with you.” Conner’s face bloomed into a smile. 

“Okay. Cool. Do you have a car?” Tim laughed out loud, grandiose and fake.

“‘Do I have a car?’ He asks. Of course I have a car. Take your pick. I’ve got as many as Bruce has. As long as they don’t come back with a scratch on them.” Conner began to suck in a breath to ask a question as Tim started towards the front door, but he held up his hand and stopped him before he got his thought out. “We can’t take the Batmobile. Don’t ask.” 

Conner frowned.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, Tim made it to a second date. Good. Hopefully it goes well...

“I think that was the best experience I’ve ever had at a sushi restaurant, Timbo. I usually hate fish,” Conner laughed, strolling next to Tim and rocking back and forth as the waves hit the dock. The grating wood on his bare feet was a pleasant feeling.

“They’re lucky I don’t ask Bruce to buy them just to fire that cook,” Tim growled, arms crossed. “Who makes sushi without rice? Isn’t that the whole point? I swear it used to be better.” He stole a glance at Conner, who was smiling down at his feet. 

“At least the squid was good.”

“It looked like bits of Starro or something.”

“Weird, considering he’s a starfish and it was squid,” Conner joked, stealing a glance at Tim, a reserved smile on his lips. Tim rolled his eyes and hit Conner with an unenthusiastic arm.

“Whatever, they both have creepy suction cups,” Tim murmured. Conner leaned over and bumped his shoulder, which sent him closer to the water than he’d like. The dock rocked ever so slightly beneath them in spite of the violent waves. 

When they reached the edge of the dock, they both looked out at the water for a few moments. The silence was comfortable, in a way that Tim wasn’t expecting. It was sort of nice to just stand there next to Kon, knowing that he could take a break and not have to worry about everything. Not have to pay attention to every minute detail behind, above, beneath, in front of, and around him. Kon could handle it. Kon could hear it. And it was nice to just be able to take a breath and relax. 

Conner sighed, then turned to look at Tim. He loved looking at Tim. Tim, who had the sharp jawline. Tim, who had the biggest smile he’d ever seen. Tim, who had eyes that put the sky to shame. Tim, whose shaggy hair was the softest thing that Conner had ever touched. Getting to stand next to him as more than just his best friend… Well, it made Conner really, really happy.

“Hey, Tim.”

“Hm? What’s up?”

“Do… Do you mind if I put my arm around your shoulders?” Tim looked at him for a moment, a coy smile flickering onto his lips. His very, very soft-looking lips. 

“Uh, yeah. I mean- no. Please, um… Please do. I would like that. Very much. I would like that if you, er, I would like it if you put your arm around my shoulders,” Tim stammered, blushing once Conner started to lightly exhale in laughter. 

“Okay. Here.” Conner looped his arm around Tim’s shoulders and gave him a gentle squeeze. Tim was sure he could feel his entire skeleton cracking with just that cute little gesture, but it was okay. He was comfortable dying like this. He shuffled over awkwardly just to get a little bit closer and lean on Conner just a little bit more. He could feel his very, very, wonderfully, deliciously defined biceps under his t-shirt. He licked his lips and kept his gaze focused on the crashing waves, trying his hardest not to look back at Conner. Their faces would be close. Too close. Close enough that he could probably smell his breath. That wasn’t really a normal person thing to think, was it? Tim wasn’t especially normal at any rate. But if he looked back, it would probably look like he was going in for a kiss. And he really, really wanted to. He bet the Boy of Steel would taste like home. But initiating a kiss? No. No way. Nope. Tim might as well open up every cell in Arkham and just let them rip him to shreds. It would be easier than kissing Conner. But it should be easy! He was his boyfriend. Well, not his boyfriend. Not yet. But he would be soon. Well, hopefully. So why couldn’t Tim just turn around and kiss him already! If there was any bit of advice that anyone had given him that had been actually useful, it had been Selina telling him that people look at the lips of their partner if they want a kiss. And lick their lips. Crap, he’d just licked his lips. Did Conner notice? No, Conner was looking at the waves, too. Wasn’t he? Well, he could always turn and look back. Wait, no, he could definitely, definitely not do that. “Uh, Tim?” Tim flinched. World’s Second Greatest Detective, World’s Most Jumpy Superhero.

“Yeah?”

“Do you, uh, I mean, is it okay if I kiss you?” Tim slid around so he could face Conner now. He could smell his breath. It smelled like mint. And tentacles. Tim nodded, and he was pretty sure every vein and artery of his was bulging out of his body with how high his pulse was. Had he been out in the field? Oracle would have sent backup after asking repeatedly if he was okay, assuming that he’d encountered Scarecrow, not… Not the hottest boy on the planet. Well, okay, she was just about the smartest person on earth, so that had to be on her list. But… 

His lips were so close. Tim’s brain short-circuited. 

Conner’s lips were soft but firm. Not too big, not too wet, but cozy and nice, and they felt like a safe home for Tim’s. It was a damn good kiss. 

Tim’s lips were soft and small. Conner felt like he was consuming him, but he sort of loved it. Holding Tim on a rocky dock in the middle of Gotham on a Tuesday after a fantastic date and getting to kiss him? Conner felt like he was flying without having to lift off the ground.

~+~+~+~+~+~

“What do you think they’re saying?” Steph asked, chewing her bread, bored. She wasn’t especially fond of seafood, but a stakeout is a stakeout, even at a crappy sushi restaurant that didn’t even have rice for its sushi rolls. 

“Well if you would shut up, maybe I could focus on reading their lips, and… oh, they’re kissing,” Jason replied, using his very poorly disguised Bat-Brand Binoculars, the Bat-Logo taped over with a notecard.

“They are not. Already? I thought it would take Tim years to have the courage to-”

“Nah, the big guy kissed him. Tim doesn’t have the balls to- oh, my sweet lord, Tim just lifted his leg around Kon, he has lifted and wrapped his leg around Kon, and-” 

“Give me those!” Steph snapped, reaching over to snatch the Bat-noculars out of Jason’s hand. Cass could hardly contain her laughter. Jason swatted her hands away, keeping his gaze locked on Tim and Conner. If the children of Bruce Wayne weren’t already known as major troublemakers, they may have already attracted more attention. But as it stood, they were old-news celebrities, just doing things for the media’s attention. That’s what Jack Ryder had said on his podcast, last week, anyway. The Creeper had been found the suspiciously beaten up the next night. 

“Hey, hey, I brought the binoculars, I get to use the binoculars! Right, Cass?” Jason asked, looking to his sister for help. She paused her process of putting her riceless sushi roll into her mouth and stared at him for a moment, then flicking her eyes to Stephanie without displacing a singular pore on her face. Back and forth her eyes swung, finally landing on Jason’s face, then giving a shrug. She slurped up the rest of her sushi roll and grabbed at another with her chopsticks. “And besides, I was screwing with you anyway. Little Timmy looks like he’s gonna melt in a minute, definitely not do anything drastic like that.” 

“Well, I would know, if you would quit being an ass and would just share-” Stephanie did her best to reach up and around Jason, but his arm kept her at bay. Her arms were short enough that she could do little beyond swatting at the back of his head and hitting stray strands of hair. 

“Next time bring your own, BG,” Jason quipped, craning his neck to see better. 

“Names, Jason,” Cassandra hissed from behind yet another sushi roll, this time with a winding tentacle pointing out from the center. 

“Ah, shit, you’re right, I’m sorry, lil’ sis,” Jason replied, finally taking the Bat-noculars away from his eyes. Cassandra’s eyes lit up the moment he finished his sentence. Stephanie leaned back in her chair with a pout, then stared disdainfully at the abomination on her plate. What sort of food looked like it should still be moving, anyway? The next moment she looked up, a waiter was standing next to her. He very nearly made her jump. 

“Ah, excuse me, ladies and, erm, gentleman, but you’re making quite a fuss in this fine establishment. Many of the other guests have begun to complain about your, well your frankly voyeuristic and disruptive behavior. We understand that you are related to the young man outside, however we do have an establishment to run, and your loud bickering and family problems will have to be quieter or taken elsewhere,” the waiter said in his best Alfred impression. Cassandra’s face was made of stone, but Stephanie and Jason made eye-contact and very nearly burst into laughter then and there. They could each see the amusement in each other’s eyes. 

“Dude, if you know who we are, then you know who our dad is, right?” Jason started, his voice in a smooth and confident purr. The waiter nodded stiffly. “So, you know that if we really, really wanted him to, did all of our chores and asked him nicely and everything, he could buy this place and fire you, right?” The waiter’s eyes went wide, just for a moment, then snapped back to their harsh constriction. 

“Well, I-”

“And lemme tell you a secret, big man,” Jason continued. Stephanie had tears pooling in the corners of her eyes. “That one, right there,” he pointed at Cassandra, “Cute little Asian number with the adorable little pixie cut and the precious little cheeks? She’s his favorite. She wouldn’t even have to ask nicely if she wanted this place closed. So if you kick her out, you’re as good as fired, buster.” The waiter visibly gulped. Actually, visibly gulped. Tears were dripping down Stephanie’s face now. Her face grew redder and redder as she desperately tried to keep herself from exploding into violent laughter. 

“I will not be threatened, sir! We have an establishment to run, and-”

~+~+~+~+~+~

Tim sucked in a breath, his forehead against Conner’s. Their hair was mashed together, and despite the cold, Tim was sweating. 

The both of them were panting in opposite intervals. 

It was the first time Tim had made out in a long, long time. First time with the sex he preferred, too. The first time ever was with Steph in the Batcave on a Thursday. Not ideal. This time? This time was much, much more fun. His pulse was still snapping against his neck, though not as hungrily as before. 

It was the first time Conner had ever actually, fully made out with someone. He’d seen girls and stuff, kissed them a few times, but he’d always been afraid to take it further. Especially with non-super girls. He was always afraid he’d break them. And then he realized he liked guys, too, which meant all sorts of extra confusing thoughts. He’d dreamt about this for ages, though, and finally getting it was, well… Intoxicating.

If only it hadn’t been on a public pier. But honestly, neither of them cared in that moment who was watching. Just being with one another, feeling one another’s skin beneath their coats, feeling one another’s breath warm up the space between them? It was idyllic. It was everything Tim had been dreaming of for years. 

He turned his head side to side, letting the cold nub of his nose rub Conner’s. Conner grinned with the soft flesh of Tim’s nose meeting his own and started to rub back. 

Tim reached out to pull him close for another kiss.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's official. This has totally devolved. I guess that's what I get for writing without an outline. Oh, well. I hope if it's anything, it's fun! I plan on making this a little spare time series in a collection in a consistent universe between writing my actual book and school work. Sound good? Okay. Cool. One more chapter after this, then be on the lookout for a road trip story if you want! Thanks for supporting my craziness = )

“So, Timbo, are you excited for later?” Jason asked, swinging from the chandelier. Tim did not look up to acknowledge him. 

“Am I excited to see my boyfriend? Yes. Am I excited for my family to ruin my life? No,” Tim replied, sitting down in the deep fluff of a worn leather armchair. It practically swallowed him whole, but he was a fan of it. It was his favorite chair in the whole house.

“Ohoho, so he’s your boyfriend now, huh?” Jason leaned back for the chandelier to swing back, then used the momentum going forward to do a flip and land on the couch adjacent to Tim’s armchair. Tim’s cheeks burnt red. 

“No. No, he’s not my boyfriend, but I really like him. And he’s… Gonna be soon.” Jason shrugged as a reply. 

“I mean, good for you, baby bird. He’s a handsome guy, I approve.” 

“Thanks, Jason.” 

“No, really! I think he’ll be good for you. But if he isn’t, there’s an entire family of the World’s Greatest Detectives with an unhealthy amount of Kryptonite in our basement.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m afraid of.”

“Anyway, Alfie’s making a big pig roast and stuff with this huge salad and a bunch of potatoes on the side, and… You aren’t listening to me,” Jason said, sliding in next to Tim on the armchair, practically crushing him. Tim could feel his eyes bulge almost clear out of his skull. “You’re texting him, hmm.” Jason reached over and snatched the phone up, then rolled out of the chair and onto his feet clear across the room before Tim even had the chance to process what had happened. “‘You’re so sexy, Kon, I can’t wait to see you, I hope we can make it up to my room after dinner’?! Damn, kiddo, I was not expecting that out of you! I’m impressed.” 

Tim leapt forward and landed near Jason’s feet, but Jason was fast enough that he avoided the attack and managed to stay balanced on his tip toes roughly five inches behind where he was originally standing. 

“Give me that back, Jason!” Jason found himself eating carpet after another second of looking at the phone, Tim’s weight on his left foot and his right leg stretched out to his side. The phone flopped out of Jason’s hand. 

Tim pushed off of his left leg and made it over Jason’s head, reaching for the phone, but Jason had reached out faster and snatched the phone out from underneath him, then rolled away from Tim again, making it clear to the arm of the couch. 

“I’ll give it back if you can catch me, pal,” Jason quipped, dashing out through the doorway and into the main hall of the Manor. Tim rolled his eyes but didn’t offer him any chase: he wasn’t gonna give him the satisfaction, not today, not when he knew it was just a taste of things to come.

Instead, he plopped back down on the couch and pulled his laptop out of his bag and worked a bit more on some of his paperwork. His damn paperwork. Always piles of it to get done, but it was a nice place to get lost in when he wanted to, like right now. The familiarity of his fingers rushing along the keyboard and getting into that easy rhythm, the back and forth and tap and pause and tap and pause and hit and pause and tap, and… Well, it helped him relax. It helped him take a breath and slow down the pounding in his chest just a little bit. They could tease him all they wanted, but he was pretty sure that after meeting his family for real, Kon wouldn’t want to be around him any more. 

It was a stupid thought. He wished he could get it out of his mind. But Kon was made in a laboratory, raised on a farm, and his older brother was Superman. Tim was born in a city, raised in a city, and once he got a bit older he moved into a mansion. His older brothers were Nightwing and Red Hood. One of them was probably just about the poster boy for good behavior to rival Superman, but the other was a literal, actual, genuine mob boss for a period of time. And with the way they all were? 

Tim saw his family behaving one of two ways tonight. They could put on the Wayne Family Event Charm, in which they’d be the spitting image of perfection and poise, wearing all sorts of dresses and suits and ties and jewelry and speak all fancy-like, which would probably scare poor Conner to death, thinking that they were all robots that also happened to dress up like rodents at night…

Or they would be themselves. Tim honestly wasn’t sure which would be worse.

~+~+~+~+~+~

“Hey, Tim.” He hadn’t heard Babs wheeling in, but the door opening had drawn him out of sleep quickly enough to roll up to a sitting position with an audible gasp for air through his nose. She paused next to the couch and gave him a sideways smile, handing him back his phone. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“It’s okay, Babs. I don’t mind.” She cut through him behind her glasses, just like always. 

“I know. Dinner’s almost ready. Your brother’s been singing his ass off in there and I think poor Alfred is going to kill him soon.” Her hair was raining down her shoulders in a mane of fire, but something about the smoothness of her voice doused the flames. Tim’s lips broke into the smallest smile.

“You came early to see him cook, didn’t you?” She shot him a look, and this one was all fire. Tim could practically feel his hair stand on end.

“Yeah, I did. He’s such a dork, that Dick Grayson.” 

“Yeah, but he’s your dork.”

“I have to tell you, Tim, I think you might be one of the only people in this family I can talk to without some sort of exasperation.” Tim rubbed his forehead with the back of his hand and rolled his shoulders back. Babs clicked on her phone for a moment, then put it away. “Dinah,” she said in response to Tim’s raised eyebrow.

The two sat in silence for a few minutes, enjoying the company, and the silence. Dick was never content in a quiet room. He always had to be talking. Jason was the same, though he would never admit it. Damian didn’t offer the same sort of solidarity in the quiet he gave. His quiet was always undercut by the electric tension of murder in the air, unless he was with either Dick or Selina, in which case he would refuse to be silent. 

“Are you still worried about tonight?” Babs asked after a few more minutes of silence.

“Yeah,” Tim replied, nodding. A stray strand of his hair fell into his face. Babs was looking forward, at the painting on the opposite wall, but Tim could still feel the prickle of her attention on him. Being trapped under Dick’s attention was like looking at the sun. Being trapped under Babs’s was like bathing in moonlight. Quieter, less intense, especially if she didn’t want you to know, but steady enough to be recognizable.

“I promise it’ll be okay. And I’ll tell you what. If it isn’t,” She said leaning over to him now, her eyes locking with his. “I’ll help you kick their asses.” She smirked at him, and he smiled back. A half-smile, only the left side of his mouth curling up, but a smile nonetheless.

“Thanks, Babs.”

“Best future sister-in-law ever?” She asked, offering him a fist to bump with his own. Coming from her, it looked off, like a grandmother riding a skateboard, but he wasn’t going to break her heart. And she was right. He was glad for her regularly. 

“Best future sister-in-law ever,” He replied, gingerly bumping her knuckles with his own. 

~+~+~+~+~+~

After Babs had left back to the kitchen to watch Dick be a dork a little bit more, Tim found himself guarding the door. Every time the doorbell rang, his heart jumped just a bit. It was some bubbly mixture of nerves and excitement, each and every time followed by a round thud that sunk deeper into his chest than his heart when he let Jason, Roy, Colin, Steph, Jason again, and Steph again, in that order. Steph and Jason both had keys. Well, Steph had stolen keys, but Bruce had already replaced the ones she was using, so the point remains. 

The next time the bell rang, sniggering bit at the edge of his ear as he shuffled over to the door from the big armchair just feet down the hall. 

His heart was throbbing this time, bubbling over with the certainty that Conner would be the one behind the door this time. He bit his lip, then ran his fingers through his hair, hoping that the thick black would fall just enough away from his face to look good on him. Because sometimes it did, and sometimes it didn’t, and it was just better if he left it be, probably, but what if Kon thought he looked bad or something, and- no. He looked fine. He made sure earlier, after he’d talked to Babs. He even asked Selina. And Alfred. And Dick. Although, to be fair, Dick wasn’t always the most truthful when it came to stuff like that. 

So Tim took a steadying breath, looked down at his tie, practically shouted in his head, “YOU LOOK GREAT TIMOTHY, YOU’RE GONNA MAKE HIS DREAMS COME TRUE and he’ll wanna kiss you and then take off all of your clothes and then ram you into the mattress and then months later he’ll propose and you’ll have the best wedding of all time, and then you’ll have beautiful wonderful children and blah blah blah, sorry if you’re in range M’gann, I’m stressed, that’s all, time to open this door,” did his best to ignore the sneering giggles from above, probably from Damian, and turned the doorknob. 

He sucked in a breath, and threw a punch. 

~+~+~+~+~+~

“Listen, Bruce, it was just a joke. I found it funny.” 

“Jason. Deliberately antagonizing your brother is not the sort of behavior I expect from my children. I also don’t appreciate you dragging your little brother, or his friend, for that matter, in to watch it.” Bruce said from the other side of the kitchen. Jason rolled his eyes and folded his arms, face purple from the bruise that Tim’s fist had left. Some things are too quick to be dodged. 

“Yes, sir.” Jason held his gaze like few others could, staring down the man himself, but a piece of his face cracked, and he looked over at Tim for the briefest moment. Selina kept her arms folded tight across the room, not giving anyone an inch of help-- or of punishment. Damian and Colin were snickering in the other room like 13-year-olds did. Bruce took a glance at Selina, who nodded. 

“Go spend time with your boyfriend. Alfred will let you know when dinner’s ready,” Bruce gravelled, and Jason smiled, if only a little, then turned and pivoted out of the room without another word. Bruce turned the dreaded bat-gaze on Tim, next. “What’s this about, Tim? I understand you and Jason have your differences, but sucker punching him is not something I would expect from you.” Tim couldn’t make eye contact with the beams of fire scorching from Bruce’s eyes. He didn’t even sound mad, he was just that naturally intimidating. 

“It’s nothing,” Tim muttered. Selina’s eyebrows drew together for a moment, assessing the situation.

“No, it’s not nothing. I… I want you to talk to me, Tim,” Bruce said. His gaze was still heavy, but he could find his eyes now. 

“I can leave, if you’d like,” Selina said, her face soft. She was sincere, and Tim appreciated it. He shook his head.

“I’m trying to be better, Tim. I’m trying to separate Bruce Wayne from Batman. And a big part of that is being a better father. That starts with me listening to you,” Bruce insisted. Selina’s mouth twitched, and Tim could tell she was doing her best to hide a smile.

Tim looked at him, then at her, then nodded.

“Okay. Yeah. Okay. I just… I’ve started seeing Conner, I guess, and I told Dick, and he suggested we have this big exciting get-together, so you guys can meet all of our boyfriends and girlfriends and stuff, and I just don’t think I was ready. I’m just… I have the biggest crush of my life on him, Bruce. Do you remember what it was like the first day I put on the Robin costume? You were as pissed as ever. And it hurt you to see me where Jason was. But I wasn’t anything but thrilled. You started to train me, and I thought it was the greatest thing on earth. Something I was meant to do, you know? Then the wind and the adrenaline from the first patrol I ever did… That’s kinda how Conner makes me feel. Only… Only like, a lot more nervous. Because I knew I could handle being a superhero. But with Conner, I’m constantly worried I’m going to say something or do something that just ruins it all. And bringing him here so fast, and shoving him into the Wayne family… I’m just scared he’s going to be scared away by all of you, you know? I’m desperately scared of that, I think, because I like him more than I think I’ve ever liked anything else, like, ever.” Bruce and Selina exchanged glances, and Bruce’s chiseled visage cracked into a smile.

“We embarrass you?” Tim burnt red marks into his cheeks.

“Yes, you embarrass me, Bruce, you’re my family! All like, eighteen of us! Nineteen if you count Helena, but she’s never around, but sort of is, because of Babs, and then like if you count her, you have to count Dinah, but Dinah’s more of a Green Arrow Family thing, and-”

“Tim. If he really matters that much, we’ll go easy on him.”

“But,” Selina chimed in, sticking her index finger out, “If he can’t handle us, darling, there’s a good chance he doesn’t deserve you anyway. And if he really cares...” Tim nodded.

“Yeah. You’re right. I know you’re right. If he really cares about me, and I think he does, you guys won’t scare him away. You’re right! You’re right.” Tim ran a hand through the thick locks of his hair. 

“Of course I’m right, Tim,” Selina started, then put both hands on either side of her head and left her index fingers on either side stick up. Then, she spoke in a gravelly, satirical voice: “How could I not be? I’m the goddamn Batman.” Bruce looked back at her, then back at Tim, who was nearly bursting at the seams to keep his laughter in. Bruce exhaled softly and put his head into his hands. 

“I don’t sound like that,” Bruce muttered from behind his hands.

“Yes you do,” Tim replied.

“Yes you do,” Selina agreed. 

~+~+~+~+~+~

Damian got to the door before anyone else did when the next knock came. He opened it and batted his eyelashes and folded his arms behind his back. Colin matched the same posture and look, beat-for-beat. 

It looked a bit off for a couple of teenagers, but poor, innocent Conner didn’t know much better. 

“Hi, Mr. Kent! Welcome! Can we show you around the house? Timothy is waiting for you!” Damian said through a smile so wide he thought he was going to explode. Conner took off his coat and desperately looked around for a coat rack. 

“Oh, I can take that for you, good sir, please, allow me!” Colin bellowed, snatching Conner’s coat from him. The two looked at each other and giggled.

“Oh, um, hi, Damian. And Damian’s friend. It’s nice to meet you for real, now! I’ve heard so many nice things about you from your brother, and-”

“Get out of here, you two,” Tim growled, snatching Conner’s coat back from Damian. Damian shot Tim a glare. “Leave my boyfriend alone. He deals with enough evil schemes without having to deal with demonic little brothers.” Damian crossed his arms and pouted.

“Timothy, I was simply testing the hypothesis that since he’s only half-Kryptonian, he would respond less-adversely to trace amounts of Kryptonite in a handshake than full-Kryptonians. A follow-up on my experiment I ran when Jon and Mrs. Kent came to visit, if you recall,” Damian’s voice was tight with frustration.

“Woah, a Kryptonian? Like, Superman Kryptonian?” Colin asked, his eyes wide. “You just told me we were gonna mess with the guy, Damian, I didn’t know he was a Kryptonian!”

“It doesn’t matter now, dear Timothy here has ruined my experiment by fooling me into revealing my secret. We must go now, and plot further.” Damian turned to storm off. Colin shrugged and waved goodbye to Conner and Tim. 

“Damian, do you think Abuse could take down a Kryptonian? Maybe that should be our next experiment!” Tim rolled his eyes as their voices trailed down the dark hall, and he turned to face Conner.

“They seem sweet.”

“Colin is. He’s just being corrupted by the demon himself, Damian Wayne.” Conner stepped forward so he was even closer to Tim. Tim’s breath hitched, and he reached out tentatively to touch Conner’s pec through his flannel. Conner saw, smirked, and put his decidedly thicker hand over Tim’s, almost swallowing it whole, and put it directly onto his chest. Tim’s fingers curled around the fabric, drawing it tight against Conner’s skin, just so he could see the outline of the Teen of Steel. Once he was done and his grip went slack, he looked up at Conner so they were breathing in each other’s faces.

“I’m sure Damian’s not that bad,” Conner had the audacity to say in this very moment, when Tim could practically smell his lips. 

“He’s not. Not when it matters. Also not on Minecraft Mondays. Every other waking moment though? Absolute nightmare. Now please,” Tim begged, voice cracking only slightly on the last word, it’s sharp sound holding the air between them. Conner leaned in closer, a smile behind his lips, and he bumped his forehead up against Tim’s. After another second, Conner leaned in closer, closing the air between them until his lips were so close to Tim’s, so wonderfully, painfully close--

“Please what?” Conner asked, smiling in a way that could only be described as evil. 

“Please, dude, I’ve been anxious literally all day just to see you, please just kiss me,” Tim said, drawing a laugh from Conner. 

“Okay, fair enough,” He replied, grinning wide and drawing Tim close, using his hips as leverage. Tim’s lips were small and soft, like always, not overpowering, but fierce enough to offer some resistance in the kisses. After a few moments of sweet, gentle kisses, Conner pulled back. Tim’s hands still lined the sides of his face. “So, boyfriend, huh?” 

“Go to hell.” 

“Yes, sir, any time,” He gave a mock salute.

“Let’s go, loverboy. I’m gonna try not to murder my family tonight.”

“Oh? Um, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Why would you want to do that?”

“They drive me nuts.”

“Oh. My family just loves me.”

The dinner bell rang, and Conner smiled and rushed forward. Tim looked at him as he took the lead, and shivered.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait! Here ya go!

Tim shifted in his chair. The table was tight with so many people. His knee rubbed up against Conner’s, and that made his heart flutter the smallest bit. On the right, if he shifted, his knee would brush up against Jason’s which was far less desirable, so he made a point to keep angled to the left. 

Selina and Bruce sat at either head of the table. Most couples would like to be able to talk during dinner. Selina and Bruce were not most people. Damian was the closest to Selina on one side, because if anyone could keep him in line, it was her, and Colin was on his right. Next to Colin was Barbara, and adjacent to her was Dick. Cass and Steph shared the middle.

Alfred, at this point in his career, hardly served them food, but rather, set everything down with the help of a floppy-haired and grinning Dick before taking a seat at the table himself. 

Tim sucked in a breath and looked at Conner, then at Steph, then Dick, then Babs, then Selina, then, accidentally, Roy, who gave him a dopey grin and wave. Tim looked away. 

The platter of ham steamed in the middle of the table, looking less than appetizing, no matter how good of a cook Alfred was, and the mashed potatoes on the other side looked even less exciting. Tim blinked at the carrots, and they practically blinked back. There was so much more food than that, but Tim couldn’t see it, since his gaze was locked just below the ham at the center of the table. It was the easiest way to not look at anyone, and it wasn’t unusual for him to aggressively zone out from time to time. 

Conner looked around the room, too, pretending the absolute silence wasn’t extremely unsettling to him. At home, on the rare occasions these days that he’d get to actually visit Ma and Pa, he’d sit down and they’d go right away, eating up everything like it was going to be the last meal they could ever have, and they’d always talk about their days, and sometimes Conner would bring up stories from his last mission, and it would be relaxed and enjoyable. He somehow thought that the Waynes wouldn’t be a big fan of talking about superhero antics outside of costume, but then again, he wasn’t sure that they’d be a big fan of talking about anything.

Barbara cleared her throat and elbowed Dick, who raised his arms in defense. Selina took a sip of wine. Bruce glared at no one in particular. Jason and Roy fidgeted under the table, and Conner did not want to know what was going on over there. Colin giggled. No one said a word, and Conner was fairly certain Doomsday was less terrifying. 

Finally, mercifully, Conner felt like he could actually breathe the moment Steph took a knife and slashed wildly at the open air.

“I figured I’d try and cut the tension in the air. Geez, guys, did someone die again when I wasn’t looking?” Bruce’s glare shot to her. Selina smirked. Roy bit his lip and threw his head back, seemingly disjointed from the rest of the group. No one wanted to know why. 

“Um, so, how has everyone been today?” Dick tried. Everyone looked at him. No one responded. Barbara tried to flatten her blooming smile. 

The clock ticked in the background. Alfred cleared his throat and reached in to begin eating some of the ham. Damian munched irreverently on his salad. Jason moved his hands back onto the table with a sudden slam.

“So,” Jason shouted. Tim winced. “I was thinking we should share all of our favorite moments of when Timmy was little, and-”

“Jason,” Bruce growled. Jason did not say another word. 

“He’s kidding,” Dick said, radiant smile on his face, as if he was trying to blind Conner when he turned to face him. “Jason didn’t know Tim when he was little. I actually did, though! He came to see the Flying Graysons a time or two.” Dick winked at Tim, and Tim could feel the heat in his cheeks reaching a fever pitch. “You should’ve seen him when I walked past him. He was like, what, three? Two? I thought he was gonna pee his pants. I would have loved to stay and chat with him, but I was, uh, a bit busy that night.”

“How come?” Conner asked innocently.

“Oh. My parents died.” Conner choked on air and looked away to take a sip of water.

“Oh, I’m, er, I’m so sorry. I had no idea.” 

“It’s okay! It’s been a while, you know? And I- Ow! What was that for?” Dick looked away from Conner, who looked over to Tim with a whimper on his face, and over to Babs, who had presumably hit him. Babs whispered to him, and his shoulders sunk and he leaned back, before immediately reaching forward and grabbing the mashed potatoes and piling copious amounts onto his plate. Then, he glowered for several moments at it. “She tased me,” he whined.

“I did not tase you, Richard John, get over yourself,” Babs rolled his eyes at him. Selina sipped her wine, and Colin and Damian muttered in the corner. 

“If it makes you feel any better, I would have tased him, Babs,” Steph replied.

“Why would that make anyone in this room feel anything other than fear, Steph?” Dick asked. She shrugged. Jason leaned over to make eye contact with Babs.

“I’ve tased him before, if it makes you feel any better, Babs,” Jason added. Conner had decided that the candelabra was particularly interesting and decided on staring directly at it for the next few hours he had to spend here. Tim tried desperately to catch his gaze, but was too afraid to touch him. 

“No, no one is tasing my boyfriend! Not even me! I poked him with my fork, that’s all! I left all of my tasers at the clocktower, anyway,” Barbara said, running her hand through her hair with a sigh. 

“What about your back-up tasers?” Jason asked, batting his eyelashes innocently. Roy smirked at Jason and grabbed his thigh under the table. Damian pointed it out to Colin, who both made gagging sounds. 

“The point of a back-up taser, Jason, is to have it with you just in case. So yes, I do have them on me. But that’s not the point. The point is, I didn’t tase my boyfriend.” Dick nodded with her.

“She didn’t tase me, I was just kidding,” Dick said.

“Not a great joke, Dickie,” Jason snarked. 

“Have you ever met anyone in this town that’s actually funny, Jas?” Steph chimed in, her chair leaning far back with only two legs on the ground. Alfred looked at her with his eyes narrowed and she let it drop back immediately without a second thought so all four legs were on the floor. 

“I mean, there was this clown once, and-”

“Enough.” Everyone’s eyes snapped to Bruce, even Conner’s. “This is a family dinner. No talking about clowns, nor about cowls or anything else. We are trying to have a nice meal with Tim’s new boyfriend, and-”

“Jason is doing weird things under the table with his boyfriend, Father,” Damian cut him off, batting his adorable little eyelashes and pouting. 

“Jason, stop that,” Bruce said, pointing to him with a firm hand. “And I want us all to be able to sit around and act normal for once, even if-”

“Hey, B, Cass and I are gonna ditch to go on patrol soon, is that cool? Duke just texted me saying he’s exhausted, and that he just teamed up with Harley and Ivy of all people,” Steph added, locking eyes with Jason immediately after with a wink. He licked his lips and grinned. 

“Yes, that’s fine,” Bruce continued, sighing. “Even if we dress up like rodents sometimes, and-”

“Actually, I dress up like a cat,” Selina said sweetly. Bruce’s eyes practically rolled back into his head, and he took a deep breath, doing his best to smile, and coming off as very, very frustrated. 

“Yes, you do, and you’re beautiful, and I just want us to make Tim’s new boyfriend comfortable as a new member of the family,” Tim looked over to Conner, fearful that Bruce saying something so big would bother him. Instead, he found him smiling absentmindedly. “Is that so hard? So maybe, we can all start over, and-”

“Oh, Conner! You should come into the Batcave and see our Kryptonite collection!” Jason shouted, so obnoxiously loud that Alfred cut him into little bits with a single glance, though he didn’t notice. Conner blushed immediately and leaned back. 

“Your what?”

“Kryptonite collection, buddy. Maybe you and Timmy could get into it sometime, if you know what I mean,” Jason winked at Conner and make a clicking noise with his tongue. Conner continued to blush, and Tim was fairly certain his skin was a contributing factor to global warming at this point. But he looked over at Conner, looking small and uncomfortable, took one glance at his big, strong man looking like he just wanted to leave with his mouth curled into a frown and his eyes blinking with some small fury at Jason, and Tim stood up and his seat groaned with the force.

“Woah, take a chill-pill, buddy, let’s not-” Dick tried.

“No, I appreciate you trying to be nice, Dick, but Jason has been an asshole to Conner and I since we started dating.”

“You started dating like four days ago. Gimme a break, baby-bird,” Jason muttered. Steph and Cass’s heads swiveled like they were in a tennis match. Damian and Colin were silent and attentive, and both Alfred and Selina looked at Bruce, trying to gage his possible response. 

“Don’t call me that. You know I hate it when you call me that! When you and Roy started dating, all I did was be nice about it, because I’m your brother and care about you. Even through all the weird shit you guys do! Like making out on the kitchen table at eleven in the morning! I never say anything to you. But the second that I start going out with someone that isn’t Steph, you decide that it would be fucking hilarious to threaten him and insiunate that I want to torture him for sex. What the hell is wrong with you? That’s not even to mention that you brought our little sister and my ex-girlfriend along with you to spy on my date! Yeah, I know you were there. You aren’t as subtle as you think you are. And Conner has super-hearing, whether or not we were next to the ocean’s edge!” 

“Sorry that you can’t handle a joke? I really don’t know what you want me to say, Timbo. We both know I was kidding,” Jason replied, words rolling smoothly out of his mouth but coated in actual anger.

“Jay, maybe you should-” 

“No, Roy, I think Timmy should get over himself,. Because he can’t handle the fact that I’m friends with his ex, and he can’t handle the fact that I made a damn joke about Kryptonite, so he has to overreact like a fifteen-year-old girl.”

“This has nothing to do with you being friends with Steph-- I’m friends with Steph! It has a hell of a lot more to do with the fact that you don’t understand boundaries, and you think the fact that you’re the ‘black sheep’ or whatever the hell you and the rest of your Outlaws call yourselves, and that just because you aren’t Papa Bat’s favorite, you have the right to be an ass to everyone else. I’m sorry, Jason, I really can’t help the fact that I was a better Robin. I don’t know what you want from me. Just stop being an asshole to Conner over it.”

“Um, Luke and Duke both just called, Cass and I are gonna head out…” Steph murmured before standing and vanishing from the room without another glance. Cass was gone even faster. Tim stood, panting and red. Jason sat, feet up on the table and staring back with equal force, sneer on his face. 

“You think you were a better Robin than me? The only reason you even became Robin is because I was too dead to be! You never earned that name or that uniform. Not like I did. Not like Dick did. Not even like Steph did. She was more deserving of Robin than you. And we both know it.”

“I think that’s enough, guys.” Conner’s voice was a lot softer than anyone expected. Dick even jumped. “You guys are brothers. Clark and I are brothers. We argue all of the time, you know? But I really just think you both like to argue because you’re so alike.” Tim turned to him, face melting with shame. Jason stammered for a response, but had none. At least none snarky enough to throw back. “That’s what Clark and I do, at least.” Then Conner shrugged and stood up, taking his plate with him to clean up in the kitchen. Alfred stood up seconds later to do the same. Bruce didn’t say a word, nor did he pick up his plate. He just left. 

“Thanks a lot for scaring off my boyfriend, Jason. God forbid I get to be happy, too,” Tim said, leaving the room. Roy looked at Jason. Jason didn’t look back. Dick blew out a puff of air and looked at Barbara, who smacked him on the shoulder, then again when he protested.

~+~+~+~+~+~

“Kon?” Tim’s voice was small. Conner sat with Damian and Colin on the couch, eyes fixed on some animated movie starring some washed-up, forgotten celebrity. Colin had been asking him questions about superpowers, and Damian had been asking about various ways to kill him. He’d been replying politely the whole time. He turned around when he heard his name.

“Hey.”  
“Hi. Can we talk in the other room?” Conner nodded in reply and waved off the two younger boys’ complaints with a grin and a promise to return. He followed Tim into one of the nearby quiet rooms, and Tim sat down. “I’m sorry you had to see that, Conner.”

“I’m not. You brought me here to meet your family. Only fair that I see the good and the bad, you know?”

“I guess so.” Tim looked at him from across the room, weight already floating free from his chest in finding out that Conner wasn’t mad at him. He really, really wanted to be in those arms right now. 

“Timmy, this,” He gestured between the two of them, “Has been a long, long time coming. I think we both know that. I’ve had a crush on you since like, my third day of being alive. And you tried to clone me once when you thought I was dead. Obviously we care a lot about each other, and I’m really excited that I finally get to kiss you and turn you red by whispering inappropriate things into your ear and all that. I don’t think that anything shy of Brainiac consuming the entire planet is gonna get between me and you. At least on my end. I don’t know. I think- I hope you feel the same way. Obviously, Jason is an asshole, but he’s your family, too, and-”

“He already apologized. Like he does. Kinda half-hearted and over the shoulder, but he usually takes me out for ice cream or something a couple of weeks later and pretends he doesn’t know why.” Conner’s mouth widened into a genuine grin. The Kansas charm made Tim’s knees just a little weak. His jawline was so firm and set with just a tiny bit of stubble on it, and the smile tightened across the tanned skin was dazzling. Combine that with the innocent blue eyes and Tim was pretty sure that he was gonna die someday looking at that face. 

“See? That’s what I mean. You fight and stuff, but you’re still family.”

“And Kon? I’m pretty sure that if I could wake up every single day next to you I’d feel like I could actually let my guard down for once in my life.” Conner’s lip twitched, and he walked over and scooped Tim into his arms. Tim giggled and nuzzled Conner’s pec, then kissing it tenderly. Conner kissed Tim’s forehead, then his cheek, then his nose, then his lips, then again and again before pulling away, panting.

“Your family isn’t half as embarrassing as mine, anyway.” Tim rolled his eyes and used the back of Conner’s head to pull him into another deep kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it for this story, but I'm gonna make this continuity into a series of stories that aren't necessarily required to be read together but all fall into the same universe, so I added a series to the bottom. Check in soon for a road-trip based story, and maybe more as I get ideas. Thanks for the support!

**Author's Note:**

> If you think I should keep going, please leave kudos and/or a comment! Thanks = )


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